Humbly joining the Multitudes on Monday

I am thankful for...

#1 Luka's face when he's asleep

#2 seagulls, soundlessly following the ferries

#3 the word RANSOM

#4 the shimmer of the sea on a sunny day

#5 good pens that slide down the paper

#6 the brown eyes of my sons

#7 clean sheets

#8 hot showers

#9 M's ever warm feet

#10 our house in the middle of our street

Our Father

We must address ourselves to him as our Father, and must call him so. He is a common Father to all mankind by creation, Mal. 2:10; Acts 17:28. He is in a special manner a Father to the saints, by adoption and regeneration (Eph. 1:5; Gal. 4:6); and an unspeakable privilege it is. Thus we must eye him in prayer, keep up good thoughts of him, such as are encouraging and not affrighting; nothing more pleasing to God, nor pleasant to ourselves, than to call God Father. Christ in prayer mostly called God Father. If he be our Father, he will pity us under our weaknesses and infirmities (Ps. 103:13), will spare us (Mal. 3:17), will make the best of our performances, though very defective, will deny us nothing that is good for us, Lu. 11:11–13. We have access with boldness to him, as to a father, and have an advocate with the Father, and the Spirit of adoption. When we come repenting of our sins, we must eye God as a Father, as the prodigal did (Lu. 15:18; Jer. 3:19); when we come begging for grace, and peace, and the inheritance and blessing of sons, it is an encouragement that we come to God, not as an unreconciled, avenging Judge, but as a loving, gracious, reconciled Father in Christ, Jer. 3:4.

Henry, M. (1996, c1991). Matthew Henry's commentary on the whole Bible : Complete and unabridged in one volume (Mt 6:9). Peabody: Hendrickson (emphasis mine).

Father Abraham, Maria Hathaway Spencer

there are a lot of ways of refusing to be crucified with Christ

This evening I 'loved' my family by demanding that they be more like me. Me, who is giving her best, me who is doing one thousand things, me who is making sacrifices while everyone else just floats on through life.....

Such a subtle, and such an obvious deception. I should know it inside out by now. And still... it's elusive, this self. Me and my right to the throne. Always lurking.

Story about ants, but, alas! without morals;). well, maybe a little moral.

Two still asleep. A beautiful morning outside. Sounds of birds chirping come from every direction. Ants all over the kitchen counters. Avoiding the food, looking for water.

For some reason, I don't mind them when they're 'only' looking for water. It's like we pass by each other without any hostile feelings, minding our own business, maybe with even a little bit of compassion and...respect?!:))

I'm not anxious probably because I'm convinced they will soon leave. It's what they did last year. Invaded our kitchen for a week and then disappeared for the whole year. The thought that they CAN actually totally invade our house is kind of scary - there are holes in the walls, in the floor, that are sufficiently big for them to come in and bring whole armies. Last year they even had a dance in the boys' room, totally disregarding 'our world', having parties and mating rituals!!

Haha, and now a strange statement: Thank you Lord for these ants of 'mine', thank you for giving me the grace not to panic and be anxious about them, too. Thank you for making me share my kitchen with ants:)

We meet in the weirdest places - early in the morning, when I open the utensils drawer, they are there to greet me, well, actually to run around like crazy people, but that's what they always do, isn't it?!? Always look totally nuts, carrying stuff a million miles away from the anthill, or going left then right then back, then meeting someone and then off again in all directions, over the walls, in the tall grass... and still they make it home. I think they don't get overwhelmed by the IMMENSITY of the world around them and hence HOPELESS because they KEEP THEIR MIND ON THE JOB.

Who then is a faithful and wise servant, whom his master made ruler over his household, to give them food in due season? Blessed is that servant whom his master, when he comes, will find so doing.

Get off the bus!

Early morning. And already thoughts of rushing, thoughts of anxiety. Prayer, followed by anxiety. Something's wrong with that. And yet it's so familiar. Maybe recognizing it will make a difference? Leave the computer, go back on your knees.

of new beginnings

The train passes by. I like the sound of the train.

It's a cloudy little morning and my little patch of the sky is grey - that's the little sky piece that I see from my prayer place, which is nothing more than an armchair near the radiator. My Radiator Springs :) where I come to find the Living Water.

I've read a book recently and so many things were made alive inside me, so many unfarmed plots stirring, calling for rain, for the plowing. It's One Thousand Gifts by Ann Voskamp.

A little while ago, we went for a Pioneers Conference on Brač, Croatia. Through His Word, the songs of praise and thoughts, and the huge fact that the kids were with different caretakers :) - I saw the barren land within me, repented and found Him loving me. Still!! And more than ever! in the sense that I understood it better than before, another layer on the road to the center of His love. When I became a Christian I understood - that knowledge is not an enormous shallow sea, the way I always saw it before, but a small area that goes deep down, always deeper and deeper. Like, when you hear 'God loves you'. And you think you understand. And then, after 11 years of living with Him, you see that you didn't really understand. There is a vast deal more to know. Not more in the perimeter but more in depth. In trust. Trust goes deep, not wide. That's what He wants from me, to trust Him.

My prayer today: But as for me, (may I be) like a green olive tree in the house of God;

(and) trust in the lovingkindness of God forever and ever.

The spot from which Cetina rises, the river from whose banks I hail. Scary looking, ha:)? So is this trusting business.

Visits and Cards

Miro's Dad and sister came to visit us the other weekend, and we enjoyed three days of lovely company and sunshine. Miro's Dad celebrated his 55th birthday with us and we had a bbq for him. My boys had a blast, they love their grandpa so much. His name is Ferenc and he lives in Zadar, where Miro is from. Zadar is a beautiful old city on the Dalmatian coast. Hopefully, we will go there this summer and stay for a week or so with grandpa, who lives alone, since Miro's Mom passed away 13 years ago.

Grandpa said he liked my cards (I was soooo flattered:D) and asked me to make two for his sister and her daughter Ella. Since I recently bought fantastic papers from my friend Teta Beta, I decided to use those. One card is intended for a grown woman, and for some reason I kept having in mind those shoes that have a clasp, like this :). Which is why the card looks like this...

The other one was meant for a little lady named Ella, and is much more girly and childlike.

I hope the girls will have fun on their birthdays.